You know how you have a feeling of regret about past projects that once meant a lot to you but you didn’t quite take to completion?
Lack of knowledge and experience, not enough confidence in yourself, not having the right state of mind, many reasons can be the cause. This is how I felt this morning about my translation of a book from French to Albanian and my collection of poems in Albanian, that don’t have a real existence other than that in my computer. The translation actually appeared in chapters in an Albanian newspaper ‘Ars’ (which has ceased to exist) and as a complement to another book (for one of the chapters on the Marquis de Sade) and the same for some of the poems published in ‘Ars’.
While I was pondering whether it is reasonable for me to do something with these projects or just forget about them, I was walking past St George’s gardens, the cemetery turned into a park, near King’s Cross, London which reminded me of the transience of our lives and how if I didn’t do anything, these projects would disappear without a proof.
I took this photo in the summer (for a previous post) but looking at the same place today, in a wet and gray morning, it seemed much more gloomy than this.
So conclusion, I said to myself ‘hurry up and make the most of the time you have, to finish your unfinished projects, before it is too late’. Even if a copy of these books is left behind, to rest in our library at home, that will be an achievement. My son or his children may look at these and think of me (I can hear myself think, they will need to speak Albanian though, but that is another story and hopefully they will).
Translation – I will make my translation of La litterature et le Mal, of George Bataille, available online. I will have to find the right platform for this.
Collection of poems – again I will print them into a pdf or some other nicer formats and make them available online using self-publishing platforms to share them with other people.
I would never know if what I have written is good or rubbish, if I don’t share it with other people, right?
So that was my resolution, this morning. Thanks to St Georges gardens (and all the souls they lay there) and Octavia Hill (who made it possible for these gardens to be where they are). I have a special connection to these gardens as I fell they bring all aspects of life into people’s daily reflections. On this occasion they helped me take a resolution and do something about some unfinished projects that matter to me.